Showing posts with label elvira. Show all posts
Showing posts with label elvira. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

2014 Excellence Awards: Best Internet Thing


Hulu counts as internet right? In any case, ELVIRA the one and only queen of Halloween returned to skewer a new batch of old movies for 13 episodes! For this she earns the 2014 Excellence Award for Best Internet Thing! 

Can Elvira's return be a yearly thing? Can this be a monthly thing? Can Elvira get her own daily talk show? Can there be a channel that shows nothing but things with Elvira in them? (For that I'd pay the unholy gods of cable TV the blood sacrifices they demand). 

Saturday, August 16, 2014

Elvira in Best Video Since "Vogue"



I hope I embedded the player correctly above, because the Mistress of the Dark herself ELVIRA is in the new Ryan Adams video called "Gimme Something Good." And it's good! I say it's the best video since "Vogue" simply because it is the EXACT video I would make if the record industry ever healed enough to offer me a recording contract (except with me in it and not Ryan Adams).

Monday, October 28, 2013

Halloween Movie Countdown! #4 Elvira Mistress of the Dark

Elvira is not only the Mistress of the Dark, she's also the Queen of Halloween! That title alone makes this movie a Halloween classic! On another note: This movie is 25 years old!! OMG! It's also streaming on Netflix! 


Elvira's first movie displays her ample talents nicely and is the perfect boiling cauldron bubbling over with silliness and spookiness and boobiness. Fun for most of the family! 
But wait- there's more . . . 

Sunday, July 14, 2013

Using Facebook in Troubled Times

We all somehow are "friends" with people (at least on facebook) that when faced with things they say, we wonder, "How and why am I friends with this person?" These people we must've kinda liked at some other point in our lives come out of the woodwork to post hateful awful things as their "status update" just in case you might be interested in their POV.

Well, last year before the election I took the opportunity to unfollow soooo many 'friends' that now facebook is almost an enjoyable experience again. Now my facebook is filled with nice things that don't often send me into a blind rage.

Here's how you can too!


Hover your cursor over the right hand corner of a post. That drop-down box will appear. If you click "Hide" on a person's facebook page (not a page like Seinfeld) you will get another menu box. You can then choose what amount of updates you receive from your friend. For truly heinous people I Unfollow them completely. I have unfollowed hundreds of real people I know and now my facebook newsfeed is mostly full of things I like. Let's check them out!


Celebrity updates!! Kathy Griffin is twitting/faceplanting all the time and I would much rather know that Kathy is currently in the lobby signing Tired Hooker T-shirts than know that my friend from 4th grade thinks it's a particularly hard time for white people right now. FML!!!


Facebook is also a great way to keep up with people you barely know at all, but that still post shirtless pics of themselves sometimes. These are the people you really hope aren't racist or otherwise awful so you can keep getting the shirtless updates. The sexy friend who can't seem to keep his shirt on is often the hardest person to unfollow. 


Richard Simmons is updating! He'll let you peek in on his Vegas Vacation and keep you motivated to lose weight!


Classic "Star Trek" actor George Takei is all over my newsfeed (even though I've never seen an episode of the original "Star Trek").  He's got funny things popping up all the time and is a much kinder presence than your friends from college who are "face-spamming" about their Savior all the time. 


One MUST follow Elvira on facebook- I don't even have to explain! It's ELVIRA ON FACEBOOK. (One of the last remaining reasons to visit the old 'book!)


I also get updates from this website. Dinosaur Dracula is about old toys, Halloween and Christmas posts, and non-topical fun times! After unfollowing so many real people from facebook, you too will see it can be a pleasant experience too! 

Finally, I get all these updates from "I fucking love science," and I am not a scientist, but they are fun and not related to most current events. It also allows you to feel like you could learn something and let's you feel cool by subscribing to a page with fuck in the title. 

Double finally, I would like to draw your attention to the supposedly targeted ads that pop up. I admit that some ads are right on the money (I'm being offered pizza 24 hours a day from most websites I go to), but if you'll look up in the red circle to the right of Stephen Colbert's face- you'll see that Facebook is still getting it wrong. I guess I'm being told about 'WOMEN on Facebook' because I listed that I was a fan of Madonnna and Cher? 

Oh, 2013 Society, how do I survive you? 


Wednesday, July 10, 2013

No Big Deal


No Big Deal- Elvira and Kathy Griffin are tweeting at us all the time.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Halloween How-To #3


Take a little time to be scary every day! Halloween is so close, you can smell its slightly pumpkin scented rotten flesh! With so much time and so little to to do (strike that-reverse it) every spooky minute counts.

Here are a few things you can do to really feel Halloween before people start singing Turkey Carols.

1. Wear a terrifying shirt! The fatty above decided Elvira was a year round obsession, but many associate the Mistress of the Dark with Halloween- and rightfully so! So if you have a shirt with something slightly scary on it, or just an orange shirt, or just any shirt splattered with blood or pumpkin innards- put that sucker on and do the Halloween strut down your street, knowing that you are brightening everyone's holiday.

2. Eat 10,000 candy corns.

3. Carve a GD pumpkin. Or just any fruit! Or vegetable! Or mineral! There are still a few nights left to burn that sucker on your porch, balcony, or flame retardant kitchen table.

4. Eat lunch in a graveyard!

5. Listen to Hillbilly Willy 3: House of Demons on itunes, or right over there on the right! Also, take a terrifying trip down memory lane and listen back to HBW1 and 2. BOOO!

Monday, October 4, 2010

Are You Halloweening? Pt. 1


I hope you are taking this October evening and feeling the Halloween spirit!! I am watching "Elvira: Mistress of the Dark"- perfect movie!!!! Classic!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

Friday, September 17, 2010

Celebrate Darkness

Today is the birthday of Elvira- the Mistress of the Dark!!! She is one of my favorite people ever- I tend to love outrageous characters that are always in character (just like Cliff and Kendall!).

Anyway- she's hilarious, sex-sational, and above all the Queen of Halloween! What else need be said? Oh- her show is coming back to television with brand new episodes! I don't know if it's playing in my market (or yours) but check your local listings for the debut on 9/25.

And tomorrow is the birthday of someone with even bigger breasts! Nope, not Dolly, not Anna Nicole, not Heidi Montag. Who? Find out tomorrow!