Is This the Sequel?

Poster A (above) the happy sexy couple lies in bed at night, presumably naked.

Poster B (below) the happy sexy couple is just getting up and dressed in the morning, still mostly naked.
Okay so judging by these posters: "No Strings Attached" is the sequel to "Love and Other Drugs." We know this sequel, which must have been rushed since it's coming in January and Jake's movie has only just been released, won't be as good since:

A) Jake has been replaced by Ashton Kutcher. Ashton is beautiful but lacks the Oscar nominations to portray the depth behind his flawless lothario properly.

B) Anne Hathaway must have been unavailable. The choice of Natalie Portman is more of a lateral move than anything else. Possibly it's even a step up!

C) "No Strings Attached" missed a really good shot at using an Nsync song in the trailer, so double points off. It would be like naming a movie "Genie in a Bottle" or "Hit Me Baby One More Time" and scoring the trailer with "Hey Soul Sister" instead. Unforgivable.

New Segment: F.U.

Cliff and Kendall are getting hot and heavy (well, technically they were already heavy)- with their new segment F.U. which stands for F--- University! Enroll for sex tips to spice up your marriage, your domestic partnership, the affair you're having, or even the anonymous sex you're planning for your upcoming trip to the truck stop!

The segment is of course a spin-off of the fan favorite episode from September also entitled "F.U." The segment premieres on this week's Thanksgiving episode.

P.S. Do you need a way to keep your appetite down this holiday season? Just look at the above picture which features Cliff and Kendall dangerously close to scantily clad models in various stages of eroticism!

Jake Gyllenhaal. In bed. Naked.

So yes, the poster for the upcoming cinema event 'Love and Other Drugs' has been released!!! I have provided it here with a slight alteration. I don't want you to think I find Anne Hathaway's face offensive- not in the least! But in this poster she has been given a seemingly unnecessary photo-shop-facelift. It was mildly creepy and distracted me from counting the freckles on my husband's knee. (21).

Enlarge for all the glory!

The Guy Behind Her Was Probably Angry!

I just love that this is how Lady Gaga SAT IN THE AUDIENCE at the Grammy's! There is no stopping her!

Free Video!!

Starting today and for 48 hours only you can download Madonna's new video FREE from itunes! It's for her new single "Celebration" from her upcoming and similarly titled greatest hits collection.

It's free- don't pass it up!

Happy Birthday to God's Masterpiece

Madonna turns 51 Sunday August 16th!!

Also: Big Happy B-days to Kathie Lee!

News Brief!

Why don't chimps get alzheimer's?? READ here!

Texting will cause your kids lives 2 be ruined!! READ here!!

Something stupid still happens. READ here!

Something else stupid. HERE

Relief for ME. Relief for YOU???

Que Beauty! Dios Mio!

I can't wait to see Penelope Cruz in her new movie- which, judging by this photo, is a Bea Arthur biography!!

Old like a Tree

Oh Lord! Did you know that Willow is super old?? In my mind she will forever be 18 and in love with Tara. Or Oz. But the gal is turning 35 today!!

Lucky for her there was that other show about the mother for her to be on. And she's still married to Wesley and recently bore him a child.

Happy Birthday!!!

Fox asks: More Nudity Please

In the interest of equal opportunity:

Did you know some girl named Megan Fox- megastar from the Transformers movie and, uh, other stuff too I guess, wants to do an entire movie NAKED- just like they used to do in the thrities? Remember all those nudie art films from the 30's (like Gone with the Wind and It Happened One Night?)

Let's all cross our fingers and stroke our *i**s and maybe it will come to fruition! Read about this exciting possibility HERE.

Need more excitement?

Pirate Kidnapping

In other terrible news, a real group of pirates has kidnapped a group of European tourists off the coast of some place called Somaliland.

Seems these tourists were sunning themselves on their yacht and up and come the pirates. No word on whether planks have been walked, but thoughts and prayers are with the abductees for their safe return!!

Read the real news report HERE.

Is it just me?

Q: How do you make an incredibly beautiful woman look like a mammal known for eating trash in Alaska and hangin' with flying squirrels?

A: However they took that cover photo of Angelina Jolie. Zing!!

Below: Angelina returns to her natural habitat.

Bikinis are Back!

The sleepy little town (presumably full of Mormons) of Kanab, Utah is about to have a revolution! Bikinis are no longer prohibited at the local pools!! The ban was short-lived, but did cause some national publicity in newspapers and on stupid blogs nobody reads. But they're back baby! Read more HERE. "Woops!" said the lawmakers who will soon revise their poorly worded lawbooks to again allow two piece suits for the ladies

The ban was not so much a shock to some though, as the town had already passed some sort of legislation that favored "natural families" that include a working father, stay at home mama, and a big ol' litter of young'ns. Above see some swimsuits Kendall and I would like to be a part of. Below see a natural family I would love to be a part of:

Jolie Didn't Want to Love Brad

From IMDB:

Hollywood actress Angelina Jolie didn't want to fall in love with another actor after two failed marriages - she was looking for love with an aid worker.

The Tomb Raider star was adamant never to date anyone on the Hollywood party circuit after her marriages to Billy Bob Thornton and Jonny Lee Miller failed. (What about her brother?)

But Jolie fell for Pitt - after her dreams of finding Mr Average faded. She tells the July edition of Vanity Fair, "After my last divorce, I said I was absolutely going to marry somebody in another field, an aid worker or something.

"Then I met Brad, everything I wasn't looking for, but the best man, the best father I could possibly wish for, you know?" I don't see him as an actor. I see him very much as a dad, as somebody who loves travel and architecture more than being in movies."

Well, who can blame Angelina? She wanted a Joe Schmoe- but fell in love with Brad. Why would she do that? How could she help herself?? Hollywood is a fickle mistress that's for sure, especially when you're a pouty lipped, (former?) bisexual, and (former?) heroin user. Oh, and an Oscar winner!

What a world we live in. Count your blessings, and wish on the moon, because maybe while we're all looking for our Joe/Jane Schmoes we'll find a Brad too. Or not. Probably not, actually scratch that. Life sucks unless you're a Jolie-Pitt!

Which reminds me of another story:

Cliff Didn't Want to Eat the Reese's Pieces

When we caught up withe podcaster/media mogul, he had this to say about his "unexpected" meeting with the candy: "I didn't want to eat the Reese's Pieces- I was looking for a piece of fruit, maybe a carrot, but there they were- delicious chocolate and peanut buttery- and with Batman's face on them. How could I resist?" How, indeed?

Poll Results!

Look out Kendall! Is a CA Porn Tax Coming?

Uh oh! California is out of dough! And Governator Arnold Schwarzenegger may want to tax you where the sun don't shine. A tax has been proposed on "Adult Media" that could cost you up to 25% more in the back of the video store! Kendall (and millions of other Californians) can't afford to drive anywhere- thanks to skyrocketing gas prices- and now they can't afford to stay home and jerk off either!

Sucks for them- let's hope these ideas don't come to pass, and if they do- let's hope they stay out west!

Click here for the CNN story!

Friday Time Passage Help

Hey- it’s Friday!! Traditionally a slow day in the American workplace, Friday is also a day filled with anticipation of the wild and crazy Friday night you might (or then again, might not) be having. Also, Saturday is coming and you know it could very well be off the chain!!

But- on the OFF OFF chance you are looking for something to peruse on the internet this fine afternoon, look not than much further than below . . .



Feeling as fat as those Lard Lads up there? Click on their multiple chins to find out the 20 Worst Foods in America- and if you avoid those foods you might just avoid those portly fellows' fate as well.

Or you can relive your youth (or someone's at least) by reading about some awesome 80’s Commercials.

Can you handle Real News?

No? HERE you go.

Maybe you want a Funny Video?? Seriously, check it out.

Learn more about the Woman some men's magazine just labeled the Sexiest Gal in the Universe or something.

Maybe you want to see some new PHOTOS from a sequel to a real old movie?

However you squander it, have a great day.

Friday Afternoon Special

So MAYBE it’s Friday afternoon and POSSIBLY you are sitting at work BORED. Just maybe!! It might also be Wednesday at 7:30 am. I don’t know your personal reality. But either way, if you are looking for things to look for, you’ve stumbled to the right place.

Here are 10 things Kendall and I think are worth giving your most passing of glances.

A) Thirsty? Take a look HERE for a loving tribute to sodas of bygone eras. Crystal Pepsi, Coke II, we hardly knew ye . . .

B) Mankind has worked tirelessly for centuries to achieve the level of technological advancements we have to enjoy today. THIS is what we’ve done with it.

C) Today’s music scene is so diverse, and we as a human race are so loyal, it only makes sense that DIRT NASTY is a rising rap star. Check out “1980” if you haven’t already done so. It’s better than snorting coke off a hooker’s ass.

D) Speaking of snorting coke/hooker’s asses: Some shirts on this site are bad. Some are very very bad. And some shouldn’t exist at all. But you can still LOOK at them. I think I’d get the one that says “Save Gas, Ride the Handicapped” or maybe the one about librarians. Kids reading this should Google Baby Gap instead!

E) Finally, to gear up for May’s “Sex and the City” movie (or for tonight at home alone with your “Sex and the City” DVDs) CHECK OUT this addition sure to “Carrie” you away quickly to a land of shoe sales and men who like to cuddle (although probably with other men).

BONUS!
Cake recipe worth checking out—YUM!! Don’t say Cliff and Kendall don’t love stay at home mothers and alco/chocoholics!

CLICK FOR SEXY LADY! (She was the first one to come to mind . . .)

CLICK FOR SEXY DUDE! (He was not the first one to come to mind {he was close though}, but I’m trying to expand horizons here . . .)

Okay he was the first to come to mind. Der.