Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Interactive Fun!

Who doesn't like a project?!? And this one is easy and fun! (and stolen). Write your autobiography in as many words as you are old. Mine will be 19 just like me! (okay 28).

Born (okay well obviously- I mean, who wasn't?) in the south, much prefer the north. Sorry south! Love Madonna, hilarious jokes. Living with morbid obesity. Me eat pie!

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Chevy Chase

I'm just really glad he's working again! This makes me happy. Thursdays on NBC.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Halloween Shoebox Diorama

"Whoopi Goldberg and Conky Prepare to Explode Peggy Hill Out of the Asylum for Her Annual Halloween Rampage"
(Click for larger)

Friday, September 25, 2009

New Show: Vatican City Takes It!

This week our SassyBack Tour concludes with a performance on the Pope's home turf!  We sing him (and zing him!) and continually ask the old douche bag to take it! 

We've got Weird News, Dear Cliff and Kendall (we love helping catholics!), Bad Jokes, Musical Guests, and so so much more!! 

Awwwwww

How can you not love them!?!?!? I cry at all their moments and assume I will at the wedding too! But we all know what assuming does to U and Me! (They will marry October 8th in an hour long episode).

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

When Did This Happen?

Britney's Ex- K.Fed- has turned into a slightly less morbidly obese Cliff and Kendall! 

It's Almost Not Too Early!

Happy Birthday Draco!

The actor who portrays the most-of-the-time evil Draco Malfoy in the Harry Potter movies turns 22 today! Eat a green cake frosted with wriggling magic snakes!

Friday, September 18, 2009

Happy Birthday!!

to one of the two best morbidly obese podcasters working today!!

You have changed our world and brought those ever-so-sassy bits of humanity to the world and we hope you never stop!

Keep living the dream!

Thursday, September 17, 2009

New Show!

On itunes now (and over to the left on the blog) is our new show: "Cliff's 8th Annual 21st Birthday"! 

Join us for cake, ice cream, growing pains, aging, Stupid Q's, Things You Should Know, a crude clip package, and some festive Bad Jokes all wrapped up in a neat little package!

Happy Birthday Elvira!

The Mistress of the Dark celebrates her gothic terrifying birthday today! Burn a bleeding skull candle in her honor!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Fat Jokes from The Onion:

We can relate!

Harry Potter is REAL!

. . . or will be at least, whenever this part of Universal Studios Orlando opens up!

Click HERE to visit a gallery of several "concept images" of what the attraction will look like. Even though most of the pictures are of gift shops and Great Hall type restaurants, I don't care!!! It looks great- Kendall, when are we going?

Golden Award (etc.)

This January the Screen Actor's Guild is going to give Betty White a much deserved lifetime achievement award!!

She is one of the greatest entertainers in TV history, a woman who has literally worked in the medium since it was invented! Congratulations are in order!! As Lynn Rose would say, "Bravo Betty White, Bravo."
(Note: I just thought that picture was really funny!)

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

I'm Sorry . . . But



This is good!! It's ol' Susan Boyle the world's favorite homely British singer!! With this song and the rumor she's going to be covering Madonna's "You'll See" it's looking like I gotta buy this album! 

Sunday, September 13, 2009

The Sexy 1980's!

In a bold move- the paparazzi have leaked some pictures from the "Sex and the City 2" movie shoot that perfectly coincide with this week's episode of Cliff and Kendall: Coast to Coast!

This portion of the movie has the potential to be goofy- but all if forgiven by seeing the gals in their 1980's wardrobe! LOVING IT! These pictures are totally making my life a little bit better!

Friday, September 11, 2009

New Episode: The Awesome 80's Show!



We totally give the material decade what for!!! Check out the preview video above and the real thing on itunes and www.cliffandkendall.com!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Weird!

The less musical of my two favorite lesbians is going to be the 4th judge on American Idol- strange!  

Monday, September 7, 2009

Happy Labor Day!


. . . from two unemployed people. Enjoy your day off! And if you have to work, silently curse each person you come into contact with that isn't at work today.

And if you want to know the REAL meaning of today- it's included in this week's podcast "Los Angeles is Burning." (on itunes and http://www.cliffandkendall.com/)

Saturday, September 5, 2009

More Strange People

Visit http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/ these are possibly even weirder than all those Walmart . . . um, how to put it kindly? uh . . . Walmart shoppers at the site mentioned in the post below.

Blog Devoted to Halloween Specials


Is this too early for you?? Tough! It's never too early for halloween for Cliff and Kendall!

Really- I just wanted to get this up here in case I forget later, but there is a blog devoted to Halloween specials out there- http://halloweenspecials.blogspot.com/ and we just thought you guys might like to peruse it if you've nothing better to do between now and Oct. 31.

Don't FEAR- we'll keep you up to date on all kinds of Halloween coverage!

Friday, September 4, 2009

Wise Words!

"The difference between the almost right word & the right word is really a large matter--it's the difference between the lightning bug and the lightning."
-Mark Twain

(I saw this quote by our fellow southerner twice today in two disparate places- so I thought I'd pass on the wisdom!)

Must See: People-of-Walmart.com

Check out People of Walmart.com for a look at all the people . . . sadly when you're there- you're one of them.  (http://peopleofwalmart.com)

New Show: Los Angeles is Burning

This week we are investigative reporters and share the news of the forest fires scorching L.A.

Also!! We have a Media Minute explosion! Where we cannot handle some crazy hot media that has been inflicted upon us lately (see blog posts below) and we head into Busheltown for a journey to the heart of the TRUE MEANING OF LABOR DAY.

Also!! Bad Jokes- on the spot fire coverage- answers to last week's question- this week's INTERACTIVE QUESTION- and whole lot more, covered in a specially blended SASS SAUCE! Look for it here later today and on itunes!

Too Much Twilight!

Now I am in favor of Robert Pattinson's big mop of greasy hair just like all the other girls I'm in sixth grade with- BUT! This "Wuthering Heights" tie-in is too much! Must classic literature be sold upon the basis of these (watch out) not very good books???

Now in the interest of fairness and transparency, I will admit I've never read "Wuthering Heights"- but I did read "Twilight" and . . . didn't care for it! It wasn't horrible- I just read through 400 pages where NOTHING happened and even though I had another 100 pages left I found I couldn't possibly care less what happened to these people. No offense!

Now I do like vampires well enough, and maybe I didn't care for "Twilight" because I already had a vampire series to read: Charlaine Harris' Sookie Stackhouse books (the basis for HBO's 'True Blood')- which, I will have you know, I read BEFORE they became a show. I bought the first book "Dead Until Dark" from an old dude selling paperbacks on a card table outside Walgreen's beneath the Astoria-Ditmars subway stop in Queens. I believe I paid $1.25 for it.
Now I've gotten this out of my system. Is everybody as ready for Halloween as I am? All this vampire chatter has me excited!

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Excuse me-

When did "The Tyra Banks Show" become informative? Is she applying for the same endowments for the arts grants that we are with our informational episodes like:

Clean Week
Emergency!
June Awareness Month

And why did she win an Emmy for all her information dispersal?

Ohhhhhhhhh. There probably were no other informative talk shows. Nevermind.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Some Quick Happy News . . .


Mark your calendars for next Memorial Day!  The world's favorite sexy foursome are coming back to movie theaters everywhere!!

"Sex and the City 2" began filming recently in my hometown of Manhattan!

Come on girls- do you believe in love?  Carrie's got something to say about it, and it goes something like this . . .

Please Stop Fucking!!!!


In a bit of horrible news that I totally called on a podcast earlier this summer- the incredibly irresponsible and IDIOTIC Duggar family is about to unleash another child onto this overpopulated planet!

NO THANK YOU!

I knew from the title of their insanely ludicrous TV Show "18 & Counting . . ." that they would have another child. TLC probably paid for it! These people need a fucking condom, vasectomy, hysterectomy, BIRTH CONTROL, or something!!! I understand the opposition to abortion- but wear a FUCKING RUBBER!!!

STOP HAVING SO MANY FUCKING BABIES!!!!! THEY ARE STEALING ALL MY OXYGEN!

(I know all the kids are cute and shit, but does any one family need 19 people???? What if we all did that? We would have to mow down every inch of forest, fill in all the lakes and rivers, and build houses on the polar ice caps, and still we would all die. I just know it!)

Free Video!!


Starting today and for 48 hours only you can download Madonna's new video FREE from itunes! It's for her new single "Celebration" from her upcoming and similarly titled greatest hits collection.

It's free- don't pass it up!

Happy Birthday Lily Tomlin!


The star of two films in my all time top 10 favorites list (9 to 5 and Big Business) turns 70 today!!

Wish her a happy birthday in your head and send some good wishes to her out into the universe!! And if you have her phone number, by all means give her one or two ringy dingies (Laugh-In reference).

Celebrate!