New Episode: 297 - The New York Tribute Show

This week's episode is dedicated to the biggest of apples- old New York City itself! If ever a city were worthy of a tribute by two fat men who host an internet talk show . . . well, you can finish this sentence for yourself. 

We've got all you ever wanted to know about the home of the Empire State Building, Broadway Theater, and 60 trillion cockroaches. Included in the show: an NYC Tip Quiz, Stupid Questions, and a Journey to Busheltown that Kendall calls "harrowing." It's true- you can listen for yourself, Kendall calls it harrowing right on the air! 

You can listen to this show there, you can listen to this show anywhere! Just download from itunes or listen in that playbox over on the right. 

SPIN! SPIN! SPIN!

As we've heard "Glee" has plans in store to rip our hearts out: they're "graduating" most of our beloved cast at the end of season 3!! Rachel, Finn, KURT, and presumably Quinn, Puck, and I would guess Blaine! How the hell would he stay around when Kurt's gone? He doesn't even go to the same school!

BUT, according to THIS brief article- there could be hope yet! Now I would have them all fail some classes and repeat a few grades (since they never seem to do anything in school other than hang out and sing in the rehearsal room). But, there is a tiny, minuscule chance that there could be a . . . SPIN-OFF!

Yes, in the grand tradition of "Rhoda," "Gomer Pyle USMC," "Maude," and "The Alan Program" some of our beloved songbirds might get their own show! The article mentions a possible show about Kurt and Rachel (and some other "artists") that've moved to New York to start careers! And surely Blaine could stowaway and be there too!

Think of them hailing cabs, waiting tables, performing in off-off-off-off-Broadway shows, running into Patti LuPone every few weeks or so . . . genius!

Chant with me: Spin-off! Spin-off! Spin-off!

Kathy Wants a Tony!

Our Lady of Broadcast Comedians is coming to the Great White Way!!

For the lay-people amongst us: Kathy Griffin is headed to Broadway! Her show entitled "Kathy Griffin Wants a Tony" will run for eight performances beginning in mid-March.

In a bid to convince the Tony committee just how Funny a Lady she is, she promises the show will be unique each night due to the "revolving door" of popular culture! Looks like she'll be well on her way to completing her EGOT. In other news: Kathy's also filmed an upcoming guest appearance on the CBS legal drama "The Defenders." Can another Emmy be far away?

Break a leg, Kathy! (and Note to Kendall: We need to do a Kathy show!)

Also:

James Franco is Just Like Us!

I love James Franco because he's just like Cliff and Kendall: He's an artist!! Although Cliff and Kendall are the world's fattest artists working almost exclusively (almost) in the medium of podcasting and bloggetry- and James Franco is amazingly sexy and is working in seemingly every medium.

Click HERE for an article on his upcoming contemporary art show in Manhattan. I want to go! And not only because many fine artists enjoy taking naked "portraits" of themselves! (It counts as a portrait if it's framed.)

Love it

What did I ever do to Jay-Z and Alicia Keys that they teamed up to torture me with this song about my hometown of NYC? It's working Hova!! I gots to get back.

The Sexy 1980's!

In a bold move- the paparazzi have leaked some pictures from the "Sex and the City 2" movie shoot that perfectly coincide with this week's episode of Cliff and Kendall: Coast to Coast!

This portion of the movie has the potential to be goofy- but all if forgiven by seeing the gals in their 1980's wardrobe! LOVING IT! These pictures are totally making my life a little bit better!

If You're in the New York Area . . .

Pretend you are me (Cliff) and mosey on down to the Sunshine cinemas on Houston at midnight tonight or tomorrow and buy yourself a ticket to "The Great Muppet Caper." I'll be the one crying in the corner down here in dixieland. But I swear to you, dear reader, that I am not the English Patient and the Sunshine is not Kristin Scott Thomas left alone in the cave. I am coming back for you!! Do you get me?

Whether you do or not, you'll want to return in a few weeks when the play "Casablanca."

God Hates Vegetarians

So yesterday- downtown Manhattan- Veggie Pride Parade- showed up when the big marriage between a carrot and a peapod was supposed to be taking place. Didn't see no vegetable nuptials!! The day was as wet and disgusting as a vegetarian's bowel movement, possibly causing the festivities to be bumped up. Possibly God made the animals for us to eat, as my Grandmother says.

AOL on our hometowns:

Kendall and I live in the (2) center(s) of the world, and this invites criticism from those terrified of 18 lane highways and the hordes of pick-pockets waiting to pounce on anyone with a fanny pack.

But luckily AOL has come along to defend us!

Here's what they say about New York and LA, respectively:

New York City
The high cost of living and dense population of New York City make it seem a daunting place to live. The average price of a Manhattan apartment is $1.3 million. Parking spaces go for the price of McMansions in other cities. And many apartments aren't that much bigger than parking spaces. However, New York City is still a land of opportunity -- whether you're seeking fame, fortune, culture, or just want to live in the center of it all. On that score, no other city can compete.

Los Angeles
Fires, freeways and active encouragement of all that is fake in American culture -- that is what L.A. is known for. It was also called the most polluted city in the country by the American Lung Association. However, Los Angeles is the nation's trendsetter and the most creative outcasts from other communities all go there to find work, acceptance and some fun.

Thank God they are on the case! And now our families are free to come and visit us.

pinkberry

So this summer I went to LA and visited Kendall for a week. On this trip I was introduced to pinkberry. Pinkberry, if you don't know, is a yogurt(like) frozen dessert topped with, uh, toppings. Most of the toppings are fruits, but you can also get crushed up Oreos, carob chips, or even Cap'n Crunch.

I don't want to make this sound better than it is (its not like Paula Deen's banana pudding) but it is actually very good. It was so good that I made Kendall take me there maybe 4 or 5 times over the 8 days I was there.

And now pinkberry is expanding (I guess) because they have lit upon the concrete shores of Manhattan. Most locations in New York and downtown in the hipper areas of the city. One location just happens to be about 4 blocks from my office. You can head over to our food blog http://diaryoffood.blogspot.com to see just how many times I've been there since I discovered its existence last night, and to keep track of how many times I visit in the future.

Yeah, that's it.

dear god, why did you make mondays?

My, how the tables have turned! It was only a few months ago that I would get a call from Kendall as he was driving home from work, and he would ask "so what did you do today?"

I would reply, "well, I woke up around 1:30 and went to the library where I checked out some DVDs and then I watched one of those DVDs and then I laid here in the heat (it was summer in New York without air conditioning) and the I ate some stuff and then you called."

This is because I was unemployed. Horribly, torturously, tediously, terrifyingly unemployed.



Now the roles have been reversed. I have a job (not a career, there's a big difference) and Kendall's at home everyday. He's got a career, but momentarily no job.

It happens. 'It' being 'life' and 'shit.'

But that brings me to now, MONDAY. Typically, this non-career-job I have is the epitome of easy. And today is no different, except for the fact that every 'easy' task I've undertaken has been an ordeal not unlike old whats-his-face pushing that boulder up Mt.-whaddyacallit.

I suppose without Mondays, Fridays wouldn't seem as sweet. That's what Kendall would say. Although I know that when out of work, everyday seems like every other day and Mondays, Fridays, its all the same. I don't miss not working. Not in the least. But sleeping until 2 in the afternoon on a Wednesday, now that gives me a reason to look forward to retirement.