Saturday, January 24, 2009

Obama Rumor


Psst!!! Don't tell ANYONE! I heard a very hush hush, on the down low, off the QT rumor that our new glorious Pres. Obama is a closet VEGETARIAN!!

That's what I hear. He's also a closet smoker, BUT he's trying to quit. A smoking vegetarian in the White House- Hello, 2009!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

A Song About Friendship



Above- a sweet song of friendship, below the saddest song ever!!

Death by Peanut Butter


PUT THAT PEANUT BUTTER CRACKER DOWN!!!!

Read this and see if you may already have salmonella from that snack bag of cookies you bought at the gas station. 

Friday, January 16, 2009

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Today is the King's Birthday

Yes today was born unto you, in the city of Tupelo, a babe which was Elvis the King. Rock and Roll, etc. You gotta give propers!! Above is a video which my grandmother says will "kill ya" and was on the radio incessantly after Elvis' death in '77. It's called "The King is Gone" but long may he reign!

Craziness! Woman burned alive for Witchery!


Click HERE to read the CNN story of a woman in Papa New Guinea (or somewhere) that was burned alive!! Terrible!!!

What's next?!?? Burning people alive for podcasting? Witchery should be embraced and loved! What's wrong with a little Love Potion #9? Nothing! Let's all love one another and our differences! Have you ever been karmically bitch-slapped by a six armed goddess? Well- you will be if we don't all learn to get along!

Bald Man of the Month

This month's choice is that affable old teddy bear Ed Asner. Best known for playing the affable old teddy bear Lou Grant, Asner has also portrayed Santa Claus in too many films and television specials to count. Although he will turn 80 this year, he is still hard at work and voices one of the lead characters in the upcoming Pixar film "Up."

Let's hear it for one of our favorite chrome domes! To learn more visit:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_Asner

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

it's time for a Cliff and Kendall cartoon!

**click for larger**

it's time for a Cliff and Kendall cartoon!

**click for larger**

it's time for a Cliff and Kendall cartoon!

**click for larger**

We All Get Old

You know, you may be thinking of how you used to be younger, tighter, and more sexually desirable- BUT! Did you ever realize we all get old and sad looking??

Even the sexiest of us- turn gray, wrinkly, and fall prey to the thrall of Cheetos brand snack foods. Now you may be saying, "Hey! At least they had their glory days!" Ah, BUT! Do you think it's easier to look in the mirror and see the ravages of time on your once gorgeous face that made others swoon- or do you think it's easier to look in the mirror and think to yourself, "Well, I always looked like shit." I believe the latter.


And don't give me that shit about Sean Connery being perenially sexy. Nay!! He is a dried up old cowhide and has been for decades. So- watch out Zac Efron and friends- You are next!

Monday, January 5, 2009

No, Dan!! No!

Dear John Goodman,

We LOVE you! Don't die of excessive hotcakes!! Below you can see a vintage photo of two other obese gentlemen. We've changed! Look above- Weight Watchers works!! You just have to follow the plan. In this new year, let's all get healthy and start being better human beings.

Love,

Cliff and Kendall

P.S. Take care of yourselves everyone!!! The cake is NOT THAT GOOD, put down the damn fork!

Kendall be Lovin' Football!


Get out your cereal bowl Kendall! Cap'n Crunch has granted every wish your football worshippin' self ever had!!! Now you can dream of goal plays, and kick starts, and hut hut huts while you're eatin' your morning cereal!!

What could be next????????????

Friday, January 2, 2009

Favorite TV of the year that's now over


Okay- I would say that my favorite show of last year was AMC's Mad Men. The first season I watched from Netflix and season 2 from Kendall's DVR. Brilliant!

The 60's, Cigarette ads, women treated like objects, minorities treated like less- a very eye-opening show that let's us see how far we've come. But still so far to go- can you see the pro(Obama)mised land??

Now, I'm gonna bet that Kendall's favorite show was "Lost." If you don't know much about that show- check our podcast archives because we did an entire episode devoted to it! Aww, and it was our first show in HD- memories . . .

Honorable Mention: Roseanne Reruns!

"Roseanne" was one of the all-time best sitcoms ever- and is really just as hilarious and fresh- and VITAL today as ever. How long has it been since you've seen a show about REAL POOR PEOPLE?? Not a caricature, or an exploitative 'reality' show? "Roseanne" deserves to be seen again (and most seasons are very affordable on Amazon- $15-$20 a piece).

I must say watching the Connors struggles makes me feel MUCH BETTER about being poor and imperfect! Try not feeling like a pile of obese shit while watching "Gossip Girl"- now watch "Roseanne" and feel your self confidence rise!!!! A++++

Oh No!!!!

Rosie has quit her blog (at rosie.com)!!! No! I hope she continues to work and get her opinions out there somehow. Don't give up, Ro!

But, since she has decided to rest (and hopefully it's just that) I have decided that Kendall or I will post at least one thing EVERY DAY this year!! (Or that's how it will average out). YES!!

So, see over there on the sidebar how it tells us that December 08 had only 7 (or so) posts (June had over 60, mind you!) well- this year January will have 31 at the very least. Oh yeah!

I'm sorry we've neglected you. Let's make amends. Welcome Home.