Happy Valentine's Day!

We really do want you to be our Valentine!! That's right- no need to look behind you- we want YOU to be our Valentine!

Whether you're currently reading this on your Blackberry as you walk down a candlelit hallway en route to your naked lover who is patiently awaiting you on a bed of rose petals, or if you are eating Donut Stix at your desk and trying to stretch the waist of your pants a little bit- we love you!

There's no better way to celebrate today than by listening to this week's Heart Shaped episode of Cliff and Kendall (in the player over on the right!)- you can turn it on as you drink beer after beer by yourself or during your erotic love-making; it's a versatile show!

Just make sure you are living and loving (someone/something) today- the only Valentine's Day 2011 there will ever be! (As far as we know).

**Also do you doubt Cliff and Kendall's effect on culture? Check out the Sassy Hearts in the photo up top!

***P.S. History Lesson:

According to my Grandmother, in the olden days- a young lover would come to your house and leave a Valentine for you on your porch! (Kind of like reverse trick-or-treating). Your admirer would tap on your door with a stick to make some noise and then scamper away before you got out to pick up your Valentine!

VALENTINES DAY video

The internet is a wonder- here is part one of the classic special "Be My Valentine, Charlie Brown" from Youtube.  Parts 2 and 3 are also online- as is the entire "Charlie Brown Valentine" special from the early 2000s.  

Happy Valentine's Day from Cliff and Kendall- wishing you lots of chocolate, conversation hearts, and if the opportunity presents itself: mega boning.  

it's time for a Cliff and Kendall Valentine's cartoon!

**click for larger**

Poll Results!

February 14th is Special

CLICK ON THE ABOVE HOMOSEXUCARD TO VIEW A LARGER VERSION, sorry, I didn't realize I was screaming.

Emergency Valentine Gift List

With Valentine’s Day looming TERRIFYINGLY close, we thought you may need help finding a gift for your special someone. Here is a list of acceptable gifts:

1. Personalized Hershey chocolate card thing. Nothing says “Love” like icing spelling out “love” on a piece of candy.

2. Biography of Johnny Depp. If you are dating a woman she will think you have tapped into her psyche and found her secret wish that you were Johnny Depp. She wouldn’t even care if you had scissorhands. If you are dating a man he will think this book holds all keys to his future Depp-dom. If you are alone, it’s just a fascinating read. He was in makeup How Long for Pirates 2???

3. The first season of HBO’s “Tell Me You Love Me.” I haven’t seen it, but everyone is naked for the entire length of every episode. The title can also be seen as a directive to your Valentine. This may seem desperate. Just emphasize the hours of nakedness.

4. A diamond ring. Girls like that shit, right? It also will give you both an excuse to use the word ‘bling’ several times. That’s fun.

5. Life insurance. This is only for those who plan on offing their loved ones in the near future.

6. Steak of the month club. I can hear Kendall saying, “That’s the gift that keeps on giving” or he might change it to, “The gift that keeps on mooing.” Whatever, if you eat meat then it’s like a jackpot.

7. Finally, if you are single on this holy day of love, I recommend giving yourself lots and lots of ice cream. And then lots and lots of gin.